The Canvas

Why you should have a space you can call your Canvas? This is how my house’s walls became my canvas and what did it mean to me.

It was during the time I really felt alone. I was frustrated because people just would not let me get to my full potential in any form. Maybe it was just a school play performance, but I felt like it was the character of my life and I was right. It was that week when everything went to shit, people from every place started bullying me and it was too tough for my friends to help me. I remember every moment of it and it gives me strength to go forward today.

Maybe I’ll write about it sometime, but today I will focus on what helped me the most to get over it: Writing on the walls.

It wasn’t even me starting that way of expression. It was my mom, my creative, enthusiastic, depressive, bipolar and lovely mother… with a little help from my little brother. I remember being a whole weekend on my bedroom: trying to be strong, rehearsing, getting better and occasionally playing videogames to immerse into a different world. I heard footsteps on the stairs all weekend, but I didn’t care about anything so I kept my mind, spirit and body inside that bedroom.

This are my house’s stairs today. Five years ago that wall was The Canvas.

To my surprise when I got out of my bedroom the walls, every little bit of those white walls, where transformed into the most beautiful canvas I have ever seen. Every part of it, from my bedroom to the first floor, was written down in an intense red color with some of my favorite lyrics. There was a huge “DON’T LET THE SUN GO DOWN ON YOU” on top of everything and an “IT’S JUST ANOTHER BRICK IN THE WALL” outside the door to my room.

The lyrics chosen were diverse. From challenging ones like “ANOTHER ONE WILL BITE THE DUST”, to inspirational ones “FOREVER TRUST IN WHO WE ARE… AND NOTHING ELSE MATTERS”. They remembered some of my performances “TO BE A ROCK AND NOT A ROLL” and my little brother wrote down his favorite lyric of my performances too “WE WILL, WE WILL ROCK THEM”. Even my girlfriend told my mother to write something for me “HOW I WISH, HOW I WISH YOU WERE HERE”.

It was pure magic.

Yeah… that’s me as the Emcee

The left wall had some of the lyrics I needed to sing on the next play. Those lyrics I was rehearsing for eight months. This was the first time I really felt them, it was the first time they meant something to me. This was the moment I left my own person to become the Emcee. This was the moment my life changed forever.

Und sagen

Willkommen, bienvenue, welcome

Im Cabaret, au Cabaret, to Cabaret!

Before I left the house forever I wrote the back of my bedroom’s door. With the same red marker they did:

Leave your troubles outside!

So – life is disappointing? Forget it!

We have no troubles here! Here life is beautiful…

The girls are beautiful…

Even the orchestra is beautiful!

Today am not there. It is not my house anymore. It’s a Hotel now. But for me, it will always be the biggest and most beautiful canvas I have ever seen.

Freaek ¯\_(ツ)_/¯



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